Paint Tha Taint @ New Year New Champ – The Matchup of 5-5 teams looks to be a good one. Featuring the most often over-predicted team playing the consistent mediocrity of New Year New Champ, this matchup could go down to the wire. Look for New Year New Champ to take the W despite 5 bye week players including Drew Brees.
Prediction: New Year New Champ – 132 Paint Tha Taint – 120
Poop On You @ Monkey Men – Of the week 11 match-ups, this, surprisingly, appears to be the worst. Fresh off a 5 game losing streak, Monkey Men should be able to take its first W since week 5. Without #1 pick Michael Vick, Poop On You will struggle to put up points and their reliance on the Raiders is always worrisome. Tom Brady should have a field day against the Chiefs and the Monkey Men will take a large shit on their opposition.
Prediction: Monkey Men – 140 Poop On You – 65
DEZ HIGHANT @ I Rip Throats – After a disappointing start, hurt by the loss of Jamaal Charles, I Rip Throats is in the midst of a 2-game resurgence. After a primetime trade featuring Adrian Peterson, team owner Oliver Rockman finds himself thin at the other positions. DEZ HIGHANT comes into the game hot, led by wavier wire QB Carson Palmer. Many may refer to Charlie Landon’s team as the all-disappointment squad, but they will be just good enough to squeak out the win this week. Week 11 will serve as a lesson that one cannot start two mediocre TE’s and still win.
Prediction: DEZ HIGHANT – 105 I Rip Throats – 99.9
Put Da Team on My Back Doo @ LION SUPERTEAM – Team owner Max ‘Yola’ Lawlor recently learned the consequences of forming a superteam. Where the Detroit trio failed Lawlor in week 10, they will shine through in week 11. Look for Frank Gore to put up some major points against Arizona and a minimum of one TD hookup between Stafford and Johnson. It is hard to go for a team starting two bye-week players, so I will side with LION SUPERTEAM in this affair.
Prediction: LION SUPERTEAM – 110 Put Da Team on My Back Doo – 97
Papa Don’t Make No Mess @ Big Fin – Though Big Fin is in the middle of an very disappointing season, (and is starting Tim Tebow) he IS playing Papa Don’t Make No Mess. After drafting Phillip Rivers in the first round, team owner Steven Vinci basically fucked himself and his roster displays inferiority. Bright spot Rob Gronkowski is not nearly good enough to put the team on his back. In the end, Bin Fin will make a big ol’ mess, nutting all over Mr. Vinci’s team.
Prediction: Big Fin – 135 Papa Don’t Make No Mess – 101
Team 199+ @ Team Comeback – What a surprise it is not to see these two teams fused together!! Unfortunately for the rest of the league, Team 199+ might as well be the combination of two teams. The rumor mill is turning and word is that Team 199+ may be in line to receive Greg Jennings in a trade. So while Team 199+ may be starting a Packers superteam, the not so super duo of Atlanta running backs will not be as successful of an endeavor. Aaron Rogers is the fucking man… ’nuff said.
Prediction: Team 199+ – 199.9 Team Comeback – 126.9
Scranton Stranglers @ Team 420 – With the poor management shown by Scranton, they might as well be team 420. After a crushing blow to the neck of the franchise QB, Team 420 is quite possibly the most surprising story of this fantasy year. For the second time this season, Scranton is starting four bye week players. This is another easy pick.
Prediction: Team 420 – 129 Scranton Stranglers – 69.69
Weekly Award Predictions:
Never Say Never Award: DEZ HIGHANT (vs. I Rip Throats)
High Scorer: Team 199+ (vs. Team Comeback)
Shit Stick: Poop On You (No Pun Intended) (vs. Monkey Men)