Asshole Awareness

I would like to touch base on a couple things. 

First off, Hide and go poop is one the most fun enjoyable games that could possibly be played throughout the school day… If you partake. This is what saddens me. I recently took a poop and sent out a text to a solid 16 people. I succeeded. No one found me, but i’m pretty confident no one came and looked for me. Why? Because they “were in class.” Scared to ask to go to the bathroom? Scared to miss how to do problem 18 on your homework?  Fuck that people. Look at it as an excuse to escape class and enjoy yourself a little bit.

2nd off, Nothing is worse than having mud butt at school. Toilet paper is not cut out for that type of “duty.” Wiping your ass. I think not. There are many different strategies to clean your anus and wiping sometimes can only make it worse. You must always be aware of what time of shit your taking. A firm Log. Soupy poopy. Dark chocolate log. (the log that is kinda soft and definitely creates a dirty bung) . Diarrhea. Snakes. (poop is soft enough that it forms due to the tightness of your asshole and just elongates looking like a snake).

You MUST be informed before “wiping.” Is wiping the best method? I sure as hell don’t think so. Wiping causes smearing, making a bigger surface area of poop to clean up. Sometimes I like to start off with the “Ass Tap” this is where you take the toilet paper and tap just in case no chunks are left behind because that can get messy in a hurry. After I like to go with the “deep crevice scoop” This is where the dirtiest part of the butt will usually be, eat that frog, get it out of the way in the early stages. After gettin that out of the way then i go with the wipe. This usually has to be repeated a few times to get it nice and clean. To conclude the butt cleaning stage I either go with the deep poke. or butt clincher.  Deep poke Cleanses the hole. Don’t want any pieces left behind that could possibly cause later itching. Butt Clinching is when I take toilet paper. Stick it in my cheeks and clinch my cheeks causing any extra residue to exit.

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